[Excerpt from "The Monkey and the Ghost Ship," by Chad and Edward]

Even though the pirates were old enough to know better, they drank and smoked to the point of folly.

They drank horrible pirate ales, wormy tequilas, dirty rums, and toxic vodkas from the Black Sea.

These men would take the fermented juices of any spoiled thing and slurp it from a bottle.

They drank until they vomited, and then they drank some more. Anything they couldn't drink, they smoked.